Doctor Fiancee (kellingham) wrote,
Doctor Fiancee

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In my wanderings across the interweb I wandered across this 'love advice' page. No, I wasn't looking for love advice, I was just hopping through a couple of links on another site. It's just so....UGH. from the crappy ascii art to the multitude of animated gifs and not to mention the ghastly and varied text colours. The worst thing of course was the content. I hope noone ever follows this advice.

My boyfriend sent me an email with a picture of a rose in it. I found it to be so cute. It really brought a smile to my face.
That's...nice. If you like that kind of thing. Where is the advice?

You can find a lot of cards at your local drug store. They are for the most part inexpensive. Unless you're like me and you buy the fancy ones. I used to do that for others.
Now, I understand that you Americans do greetings cards in a much bigger way than us Brits but surely this just sits wrong with most of you? Hey! Buy them from drug stores! Your significant other isn't worth the money for a good card or the effort of a handmade one (which I would prefer personally). Also, note the author seems to have something of an ego.

I consider this a poem:
I love you
I love the way you look at me with those pretty brown eyes
Your smile alone makes me so happy and being with you
There are no words to describe how you make me feel inside

You consider that a poem? I consider it a cop-out. You just don't end a love poem in a way that makes it sound like it would be too much effort to TRY and describe the way your SO makes you feel. Make an effort at least!

Like my mother, I often either dumped guys or snapped at them for not doing the little things.
Apparently, idiocy is inherited.

Call her from work or wherever.
Ah, I can see it now.
"Hey honey, just calling you because I should."
"Oh, that's lovely. Where are you?"
"I'm in bed with a whore."

Take from a girl who has made the mistake of cheating once in her life, oh that's a great way to convince people your advice is good if suddenly you guys don't talk much, if it doesn't seem like a big deal that you aren't talking, that now they suddenly don't mind you going out with your pals and not spend time with them, chances are one of you has found another.
Interesting really that bardi has never really seemed to mind me going out with friends. Their is a difference between trust and control, think about it.

Yelling will get you no where. Try this:
"Maybe you can do me a favor too? It upset me when you did so and so."

Ah, we're back to the subject of cheating then XD. This girl might believe she has great advice (cough) but she certainly can't write.

I express myself a lot better through my writing, always have.
I dread to think how you express yourself in person.

Thanks to one great man, he had taught me that all men aren't alike
Right. Now if only she would realise that not all GIRLS are alike either:
A best bet for guys is to buy their girl something from Bath and Body Works. We absolutely love nice smelling bubble baths, soaps, candles and things like that. You just can't go wrong with that gift.
OMG I love getting smelly things! I also like pink dresses and flowers and doing my make-up and having girly chats with my friends about OMG hunks during our sleepovers!
Fuck no. Quick poll girls, who actually LIKES getting that kind of crap? Sure bubble baths are great, and candles are romantic but I don't really consider them a gift. And especially not scented things. Did I mention being allergic to many perfumes? Yeah. And evern if I wasn't I just don't wear it often. So no, every girl is unique in her gift preferances, just like guys. Try asking her what she likes, or using instinct. If you know her well enough to get her a gift you probably already know what she likes, even if you don't realise it.

If you believe in it or not, sign research can be helpful. I dated a Cancer once for the first time. I got an astrology book and looked up his sign. It gave me things to look for as in personality traits.
I am a Capricorn. Go on, go look it up. when you come back laughing after comparing me to my sign we'll just move on.

DON'T TALK ABOUT YOUR EX'S. Don't talk about my ex's what? I'm sorry to break it to everyone but no one wants to hear about them.................AT ALL. Who cares if it was a funny story, or they did something to tick you off, etc. Just don't talk about them at all for whatever reason.
Earlier she stressed how important it was not to keep any secrets. Personally I don't really mind discussion about any of Bardi's ex-lovers, as long as he doesn't go into too much detail on some of it. The past is the past, not talking about it won't change it.

That's just a small sample of her delights. It's kind of sad really. I know I am not perfect, I certainly don't have much experience when it comes to relationships having only really been in one to speak of. It has lasted over half a decade currently though, so I think I shall carry on as I was and just ignore her 'advice'.
Tags: love

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